The Civil War in William Ruto's Kenya Kwanza is Complete: Has God Almighty, Including His Only Begotten Son Jesus Christ, Our Lord and Saviour, Abandoned Rigathi Gachagua?

Ironic twists of fate, it is said, are like inviting a clown to a funeral—unexpected, bizarre, and guaranteed to leave everyone questioning their life choices.

And so it is that the very coalition that preached divine intervention and righteousness just two years ago now finds itself embroiled in a bitter internal conflict. William Ruto's Kenya Kwanza is no longer the united front it once claimed to be. Deputy President Rigathi Gachagua today finds himself at the centre of a scandal that threatens to tear the alliance apart.

Imagine, if you will, a vast ocean of human effluence, where the tides are dictated by the whims of political buffoons and the stench of broken promises fills the air. It's a symphony of stink, a faecal fantasia where each misstep and blunder contributes to a grand cesspool of incompetence and deceit. Welcome to the poetic and hilariously pungent epic of our times!

Despite Ruto's triumphant declaration to the world that "those who believe in God won," it appears divine favour may have shifted, leaving Gachagua exposed and vulnerable.

A House Divided

The cracks within Kenya Kwanza are now impossible to ignore. Gachagua stands accused of grossly violating several constitutional provisions, allegations serious enough to warrant impeachment.

The Deputy President's alleged misconduct ranges from bribery and compromising classified information to unethical practices that undermine the very principles of governance. Article 150 of the Constitution provides grounds for impeachment due to gross violations, criminal conduct, and gross misconduct—criteria Gachagua is now accused of meeting in abundance.

"Occupy Karen" and the Battle of the Toothbrush

The accusations against Gachagua have galvanised a movement dubbed "Occupy Karen," a reference to the affluent Nairobi suburb where the deputy president resides. Protesters, armed with nothing but toothbrushes as a symbol of their intent to "clean up" corruption, are calling for Gachagua's immediate resignation. The hashtag #ImpeachRiggyG is currently trending heavily across social media, reflecting widespread public discontent.

Bribery and Corruption: The Tip of the Iceberg

Gachagua's alleged involvement in bribery and corruption during the #OccupyParliament movement has further eroded public trust.

Such actions, if proven, demonstrate a serious abuse of power and ethical misconduct. The Deputy President's unauthorised disclosure of sensitive intelligence information adds another layer of controversy, compromising national security and showcasing a blatant disregard for his duties.

Ruto's Machiavellian Move

In a dramatic twist, a masterclass in Marchiavellianism, Mathira MP Eric Wamumbi has drafted a motion seeking Gachagua's head. This move, undisputably sponsored by none other than William Ruto himself, suggests a calculated effort to oust his deputy without straying from the confines of the constitution. As ironies go, just as Ruto once used immediate former Mathira MP Rigathi Gachagua to challenge and cut down Uhuru Kenyatta in his home turf, he now appears to be using the current Mathira MP Eric Wamumbi to eliminate Gachagua. No lessons have been learnt here...and it was less than one election cycle ago. It's a political manoeuvre reminiscent of the biblical Judas kiss—betrayal from within.

The Irony of Divine Endorsement

Ruto's chest-thumping gloating that "those who believe in God won" now rings hollow. Has God foresaken Rigathi Gachagua?

Are the prayers of his wife, Pastor Dorcas Rigathi, no longer reaching the heavens? The supposed divine endorsement that once united Kenya Kwanza now seems like a cruel joke, mocking the very foundation of their alliance.

The Constitutional Quagmire

The impeachment process is fraught with challenges. While Gachagua's alleged actions justify removal from office, the political machinery required to execute such a move is complex. The National Assembly must now uphold the rule of law and accountability by initiating impeachment proceedings. However, this process is easier said than done, given the intricate web of political alliances and vested interests at play.

The Bigger Picture: Kenya's Political Landscape

Gachagua's potential impeachment is more than just a personal downfall; it signifies a broader crisis within Kenya's political landscape. The very fabric of governance is at stake as allegations of bribery, corruption, and gross misconduct continue to surface. Kenya deserves leaders who uphold the highest ethical standards—leaders who prioritise the nation's welfare over personal gain.

In the end, Rigathi Gachagua's fate hangs in the balance. Whether or not he survives this political storm, one thing is clear: Kenya's youth and concerned citizens are no longer content with the status quo. The call for ethical leadership and genuine accountability resonates louder than ever. As the drama within Kenya Kwanza unfolds, the nation watches closely, waiting to see if justice will prevail.

And as Kenyans watch this melodrama unfold, it's crucial not to invest too much emotion in the spectacle. William Ruto's regime is notorious for its mind games, often using high-profile conflicts to distract and deflect attention from pressing issues. This impeachment saga, filled with accusations and counter-accusations, could very well be a calculated ploy to shift focus from the regime's deep-seated troubles. On one side, relentless Gen Zs demand accountability and reform; on the other, an increasingly frustrated populace grows weary of empty promises and pervasive corruption. This political theatre may be more about diverting scrutiny than delivering justice, a classic tactic to keep the public's eye off the real ball. Stay vigilant and critical, for the real battle lies beyond these orchestrated spectacles.

Kenya's political future depends on the integrity of its leaders. It's time to drain the swamp and hold those in power accountable. The revolution is still on, and the voices demanding change will not be silenced.